Working as a nurse can be challenging and overwhelming — in fact, there will be days that this statement will feel like a gargantuan understatement. Some days will be harder than the typically challenging ones, and it’s important to provide our nurse partners with the support they need to thrive at home. Not only will decompressing and destressing be crucial for bolstering workplace productivity, reducing errors, and improving decision-making processes, but they’re also essential to prioritizing nurses’ physical and mental health.
Especially at the beginning of your relationship, you might not know the full extent of the stress that comes with nursing, especially if you’re not a healthcare professional. This article provides helpful tips for keeping your nurse partner happy and supported at home from a grueling day at work and fostering a meaningful and love-filled relationship.
Being in a relationship with a nurse: Tips to make your nurse partner feel loved
1. Listen actively and give them your undivided attention
When you listen actively, you’re not just listening to know the complete details of their story — you’re also accessing your empathy, compassion, and self-awareness to understand fully, respond appropriately, and build connection.
Sometimes, your nurse partner will be too exhausted to talk about their rough day. But when they’re in the mood to share their day with you and talk about how they’re feeling, make sure that you listen actively and give them your undivided attention. Be fully present and show nonverbal cues that you’re listening and engaged with their story, such as maintaining eye contact, slightly leaning forward, and nodding your head at appropriate times.
When they come home from work, ensure you’re ready to talk to them and listen without distractions, which is crucial when they need to vent or express big emotions. Doing so can help your nurse partner release emotional tension, which could help them reduce their stress levels.
2. Do not invalidate their feelings
When your nurse partner expresses their frustrations, annoyance, anger, or, at times, grief over work-related events, do your best not to invalidate their feelings. Invalidation happens when you make a person feel snubbed or judged when they share their thoughts, feelings, and emotions.
For example, your partner shared that they feel frustrated and stressed over colleagues who don’t do their jobs properly and pass on responsibility to other nurses in the unit. When you tell them that they’re overreacting, make them realize that other people have it worse for lesser pay, or give unsolicited advice on how they can better manage their time at work, you’re dismissing or minimizing their concerns. This can lead to them feeling hurt and unheard, which can affect their mental health.
To avoid invalidating your nurse partner’s feelings, try your best to see things from their perspective. Meet your nurse partner’s emotions with empathy, respect, and compassion. When your nurse partner wants to vent, they’re not asking you to analyze the situation to fix their problems — sometimes, they just want to express themselves freely. Give them the time and space to do that while providing the emotional support they need.
3. Ask questions
You can utilize asking questions to help pave the way for more open communication with your nurse loved one. Asking questions will allow you to gain deeper insights into how your loved one thinks and the things they hold dear, helping you build better intimacy, deeper trust, and a stronger, more resilient relationship.
For example, when your partner talks about a hard day she’s had at work, listen attentively and ask questions to learn more about what happened and, most importantly, to understand where their big feelings are coming from. Just be careful not to interrupt your partner when they’re speaking.
4. Encourage and join them in self-care activities
To help your nurse partner have a healthy work-life balance and care for their mental health, it’s essential to adopt self-care practices. You can help your partner prioritize self-care in their busy lives by encouraging them to make time for what makes them feel relaxed.
Sometimes, your partner’s self-care activities are something that they need to do individually, such as doing yoga, lifting weights, journaling, or gardening. However, there are certain activities that they may want you to do together, such as enjoying long walks while chatting or going for long, leisurely drives, so, make sure that you can support their self-care journey by joining them in such activities. Not only will this help them destress from work, but it will also help foster a deeper and more intimate relationship.
5. Do acts of service
Acts of service is a love language that everyone appreciates — especially people who work long, stressful hours such as healthcare professionals. Aside from work-related stress, your nurse partner might also be dealing with additional stress when they feel there’s an unequal distribution of housework in the relationship. Household chores are a shared responsibility, something that your partner doesn’t need to ask you to do because it’s something that you’re obligated to do. You can even do household chores together to spend even more quality time. Reports have shown that couples who do tasks together feel more satisfied with their house-related arrangements.
